Temple of Elemental Evil (and possibly beyond)
Halfling, Repossession Professional
Two feet, eleven-and-a-half inches and twenty-eight pounds of trouble. But my friends call me Miro. Pleased to make your acquaintance. Unless you’re recording this conversation. In that case, my name isn’t Miro and I wasn’t wherever you think I was.
- 11 Strength
- 18 Dexterity
- 15 Constitution
- 16 Intelligence
- 13 Wisdom
- 15 Charisma
- 10 Acrobatics
- 7 Appraise
- 8 Craft: Trapmaking
- 7 Escape Artist
- 10 Disable Device
- 7 Knowledge: Local
- 7 Knowledge: Dungeoneering
- 8 Perception
- 9 Sleight of Hand
- 14 Stealth
- Trained in basically everything else, but the bonus isn’t 7+ so that hardly counts, right? Gosh it’s so hard being good at everything!
- Light Crossbow, enhanced by Brother Smith to be the Best Friggin Crossbow Ever. Don’t believe me? Okay, just back up about 10 feet and stand still for a second.
- Masterwork Thieves’ Tools
- Assorted trap pieces and parts
- Fine Green Elven Cloak
- Magical Mary Poppins Backpack with an uncanny tendency to contain exactly the right thing for the job. Actually, that’s just me with the uncanny tendency, but I’m telling you it’s the backpack. You should probably humor me.
You might ask what happened to make a halfling from a nice respectable family take up the wandering, sometimes ill-reputed life of a thief- er, Repossession Professional. Yeah, you might ask. Go ahead, ask. I’ll wait.
Well I’m not telling. Actually, here’s a story for you: Mother was a cripple, father died in a tragic farming accident, had six younger brothers and sisters, forced to live on the street and steal to help the family survive, yadda yadda. Quite a story, eh? Too bad it’s not true! Well, it might be true, but you’ll never know and that’s all you’re getting out of me!
It’s far more likely that I was just an overly-coddled, disgruntled young person who decided taking things without permission was fun. And having a natural talent for, well, just about everything made it easier to be sure.
These days I don’t steal from innocent schmucks so much. Too many problems with making enemies who like to follow me around after dark, trying to threaten me. I prefer to peddle my services to those innocent schmucks after some other person of ill-repute takes their stuff. Then I go get it back for them and take a hefty percentage commission. It’s a win-win situation. I get to steal, I make money by stealing, and I don’t go to jail for stealing! Triple win for me!
That’s how I met my current band of miscreants, though they would probably protest loudly at the idea of being called “miscreants.” Whatever. Anyway, I was on a job and got, er, tied up. They came across me in a bit of a situation and freed me without asking too many questions (technically, I freed myself but they still didn’t ask too many questions or kill me) so I decided I liked them. Followed them back to Hommlet where they made me some money in a crazy cool scheme involving a cage match between some chickens and a donkey. Then they got us a job cleaning out some temple filled with bandits. It doesn’t pay much but it includes salvage rights! Score! I don’t really think it’s going to work out though. The guy that hired us was a little weird. I have a funny feeling he’s going to show up later, as the Magical Mastermind of the Whole Damn Temple and kill us all. I hate it when that happens.